I will tell you what desire without attachment looks like. It looks like being on OkCupid and seeing a picture of a guy you think could be handsome in 3-D and maybe quite kissable; finding out by reading his profile that he’s pretty bright and likes semi-colons used properly and reads Pablo Neruda and is good at building smokey campfires; typing up a three-to-seven sentence message that–you hope–conveys your own intelligence, social skills, and interest in him; and then hitting “send.”

(By the BTW, did you notice my excellent use of semi-colons? Do you hate semi-colons because you have no idea what they’re supposed to do? Are you intimidated by women with good grammar and writing mechanics? Or do they turn you on?)

This is a new experience for me. Crazy new. I think I’ve mentioned the scarring truth that I was single and unwittingly celibate for most of my…